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PET LOSS
What to Do When Your Pet Dies
A Step by Step Guide
Published by Obitley Voices. Last updated 2026.
I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is a real loss. If you are reading this just after your animal companion died, this guide is here for you.
The following steps will help you with what comes next, offering practical and gentle guidance, one thing at a time.
Step 1: Give Yourself a Few Minutes
You don't have to act immediately. If your pet died at home, spending time with them is okay. Take your time; there's no rush.
If you have other pets, some veterinary behaviorists (think pet psychiatrist) suggest allowing them to spend time near your pet's body. Whether or not this helps them process the absence, many families find it feels right. Surviving pets can also experience grief and may show changes in behavior, such as sleeping more, eating less, searching for their companion, or seeming withdrawn. Give them plenty of attention and keep routines as normal as possible. Offer comfort, patience, and time to adjust. If you notice lasting changes in their appetite or mood, check in with your veterinarian for guidance.
A note on timing
Pet remains should ideally be handled within 2 4 hours in warm weather. In cool conditions (under 65°F), you have more time. (Guidelines for Inspection of Companion and Commercial Animal Establishments, 2016) Keep your pet in a cool room for a few hours before deciding on aftercare.
Step 2: Contact Your Veterinarian
If your pet passed at home or died suddenly, call your vet as soon as you are ready. They can:
Confirm the cause of death if needed. Help you understand your aftercare options. Connect you with a pet cremation provider or pet cemetery. Arrange for them to handle remains if you don't want to transport your pet yourself.
If your regular vet is closed, most emergency animal hospitals can accept a pet's remains and arrange transfer.
If your pet passed away at the vet's office, many clinics offer basic aftercare arrangements directly. Ask them what options they provide or can coordinate.
Step 3: Decide on Aftercare
You have several options for what happens to your pet's body. Deciding can feel overwhelming, and it's normal to need time to make a choice. There is no single right answer, only you can decide what feels right for you and your family.
Private Cremation
Private cremation means your pet is cremated alone, ensuring the ashes you receive are from your pet only. This option is often selected by families who want to keep their pet's ashes, scatter them somewhere special, or bury them later.
Cost: typically $150 $350 for cats and small dogs; $200 $500+ for larger dogs. (How Much Does Pet Cremation Cost in 2026?, 2026)
Communal Cremation
With communal cremation, your pet is cremated together with other animals. Because the ashes are mixed, you will not get any back. This option is usually more affordable and suits families who do not wish to keep the remains.
Cost: typically $50 $150. (How Much Does Pet Cremation Cost in 2026?, 2026)
For a full breakdown of private and communal cremation options and 2026 pricing, read our guide: Pet Cremation: Private vs. Communal Options Explained.
Home Burial
Burying your pet at home is legal in most of the United States, but regulations vary by city and state. Before you bury your pet in your yard:
Check local ordinances, as some municipalities prohibit it. Bury your pet at least 3 to 5 feet deep to prevent other animals from digging. (Team, 2025) Do not bury near a water source or well. Wrap your pet in a biodegradable material such as cotton, wool, or a biodegradable bag, but not plastic. Avoid home burial if your pet was euthanized with pentobarbital, as this can harm wildlife and other animals. (Kollias et al., 2023, pp. 733 738)
If you rent your home or are unsure about local rules, call your county health department or a local vet to confirm before proceeding.
Pet Cemetery Burial
A pet cemetery provides a designated burial plot for your pet, often with an option for a headstone or marker. This offers a permanent place to visit and remember them. Costs can vary based on the cemetery and type of plot selected.
To find a licensed pet cemetery near you, the International Association of Pet Cemeteries and Crematories (IAOPCC) maintains a national directory at iaopc.com.
Aquamation (Alkaline Hydrolysis)
Aquamation, or alkaline hydrolysis, uses a water based process instead of fire to reduce the body to ashes. This method creates ashes that families can keep and uses less energy than traditional cremation. It is available in some locations and is becoming more common in cities. (Aquamation Information, 2026)
Ask your vet or cremation provider if aquamation is available in your area.
Step 4: Handle Practical Matters
Once you have made your aftercare decision, you will have a few practical tasks to do over the coming days:
Notify your veterinarian's office
If your vet doesn't already know, let them know your pet has passed so they can update their records and cancel any upcoming appointments. Many practices also send a condolence card.
Cancel subscriptions and deliveries
Pet food delivery, medication auto ships, grooming appointments, and similar services should be canceled. Handling this early can help, as it can be painful to receive an order after your pet is gone.
Consider pet insurance claims
If your pet had insurance and died from illness or injury, file a final claim. Check your policy or call your provider.
Your pet's belongings
There's no set time to address your pet's belongings. Some families donate items quickly for comfort; others keep them. Do what feels right for you.
Step 5: Tell the People Who Loved Them
Your pet was part of other people's lives too, like your children, close friends, or a neighbor they greeted every morning. It is okay to reach out and share the news. Most people who loved your pet will want to know.
For children, a brief, honest conversation is better than avoiding the subject. "Max died. It means he isn't alive anymore, and we are very sad because we loved him." Simple and true is enough.
Step 6: Honor Their Memory
Grief for a pet is real. Honoring your pet's memory helps move through loss.
Create a digital memorial
A digital memorial gives your pet's story a home, where you can collect photos, share memories, and preserve what made them special. Obitley's Life Story feature lets you build a lasting memorial page for any pet, at no cost.
Start a free memorial for your pet at obitley.com
Physical remembrances
Many families find comfort in a physical keepsake. Options include:
Paw print casting kits (available at most pet stores) Custom portrait from a photo A small garden stone or memorial marker Planting a tree or garden in their honor Keeping a small amount of ashes in a keepsake urn or piece of jewelry
A note of remembrance
Writing down your pet's story, such as how you found them, what made them funny, what they loved, and how they made your life better, is both a gift to yourself and a record worth preserving. It doesn't have to be long. It just has to be true.
The Grief Is Real
Studies consistently show that grief for a pet can be as intense as grief for a human loved one. (Salamon, 2026) If you find yourself struggling, such as being unable to sleep, unable to eat, or feeling a deep sadness that lingers, you are not being dramatic. You are grieving. If your grief feels like too much to handle alone, know that it is okay to ask for help. Reaching out to a counselor, therapist, or support group can make a real difference and is a strong and hopeful step forward.
Give yourself time. Talk to someone. The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement (aplb.org) offers free online support groups for adults grieving a pet. Your own therapist or counselor can help, too.
Many people find that grief comes in waves. Something will remind you of them, like their food bowl, a sound they used to make, or a spot they loved to sleep, and the loss will feel fresh. That is normal. It passes, and sometimes it returns.
Resources
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What should I do immediately after my pet dies?
A: Take time to say goodbye and process your emotions. There is no rush. You can sit with your pet for a while and, if there are other pets, allow them to spend time nearby. When ready, consider contacting your veterinarian for guidance.
Q: How long can I wait before handling my pet's remains?
A: Ideally, handle remains within 2 4 hours in warm weather. In cooler conditions, you may have more time. Keep your pet in a cool room while you decide on aftercare.
Q: What are my options for aftercare?
A: Common choices include private or communal cremation, home burial, pet cemetery burial, and aquamation. Each has different costs, regulations, and environmental impacts.
Q: Can I bury my pet at home?
A: Home burial is legal in most areas, but check local regulations first. Bury your pet at least 3 5 feet deep and avoid burying it near water sources. Do not bury pets euthanized with pentobarbital, as it can harm wildlife.
Q: How do I help surviving pets with grief?
A: Offer comfort, patience, and keep routines as normal as possible. Watch for changes in appetite or mood and consult your vet if needed.
Q: Where can I find grief support?
A: The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement (aplb.org) offers free support groups. Counselors and therapists can also help.
IAOPCC (International Association of Pet Cemeteries and Crematories): iaopc.com Cremation Association of North America (CANA): cremationassociation.org Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement: aplb.org Obitley Pet Memorial: obitley.com
For funeral professionals
The pet aftercare market is growing at nearly 10% annually, and fewer than 15% of funeral homes currently offer pet death care services. (Pet Aftercare Service Market Size, Share & Growth | CAGR Forecast 2032, n.d.) If you are a funeral professional exploring this space, Obitley's business profiles are built to help you reach families searching for exactly these services.
Obitley Voices is a shared publishing platform for funeral professionals, caregivers, and families navigating loss. Content is written and reviewed by the Obitley editorial team.
Learn more at obitley.com/voices